Let’s face it, no one gets SUPER excited about that dried up old bird that’s the centerpiece of every family Thanksgiving. And no, I’m not referring to sometimes lucid, more often not, Great Aunt Mildred.
Yet, for some reason, the holiday wouldn’t be complete without this large, tired tidbit of the traditional spread. So why not make it delicious?
How? You ask. Well, if you’ve read our posts up to this point you know we are dying to fry stuff. Like really we can’t get enough. The giddiness I exuded whilst skipping through Sam’s Club with a 5-gallon jug of peanut oil in tow should be indication to all.
Not only are we going to fry this bird, we are going to shove all kinds of citrus and herbs up it’s rear, brine it, and literally inject it until it resembles the lips on Angelina Jolie’s face.
Speaking of faces, I CANNOT stress enough the importance of following all the manufacturer’s instructions on frying your turkey. Take a page out of my book and watch a certain YouTube video that details the safety precautions and is narrated by a woman who, at the end of the video, reveals has had her face burnt off by exploding grease. I watch it EVERY year, and even though I know how it ends, I jump every time. It’s a powerful cautionary tale.
My mother always said, ‘If you can’t lead by example, then be a horrible warning.’
kyle’s fried turkey
- 1 (10 to 12-pound) turkey, thawed and giblets and neck removed
- citrus brine (recipe below)
- kyle’s dry rub (recipe below)
- 5-8 gallons peanut oil - OMG!
- Tony Chachere’s Injectable Creole Marinade*
*We prefer the Tony Chachere’s marinade but feel free to branch out and try others or even make your own.
Place turkey into brine for at least 12 but not exceeding 24 hours. Adding ice as needed. I use a large cooler as to not take up prime refrigerator space, just be sure to keep it below 40° by adding ice when needed. You could also use a brining bag and submerge that in cooler covered in ice so you don’t have to bleach it out afterwards.
Remove bird from brine and pat dry. Inject both breasts, thighs and wings from 2 angles with marinade. Seperate skin from meat by wiggling your hand in there. So nasty, but worth it. Apply dry rub in between skin and meat as well as you can, then rub remaining rub over top of entire bird. Allow to rest for 2 hours before frying.
Cook turkey according to your fryer’s manufacturers instructions. Do NOT attempt this inside. Ever. I realize that’s common sense, but if MTV’s ’16 and Pregnant’ is a good indicator, stupidity is running rampant these days.
- 5 large oranges, quartered
- 3 red onions, quartered
- 4 lemons, quartered
- large bundle of fresh rosemary, tied
- 2 cups salt
- 2 cups brown sugar
- 2 cups hot water
- 5 gallons cold water
- 20 pounds ice
In a large cooler, combine onions, lemons, oranges, ice and 5 gallons cold water. Dissolve sugar and salt in hot water and add to mixture.
- 1 tablespoon sugar
- 1 tablespoon Kosher salt
- 1/2 teaspoon pepper
- 1/2 teaspoon paprika
- 1/2 teaspoon ground mustard
- 1/4 teaspoon garlic powder
- 1/4 teaspoon thyme
- 1/8 teaspoon cayenne pepper
Mix all spices in a small bowl until blended.