pairs well with: Jack the Giant Slayer + fancy-ass pigs in a blanket

“Jack the Giant Slayer” stars Nicholas Hoult as the farm boy who buys magic beans, like the classic Jack & the Beanstalk fairy tale. This time, instead of one giant we have an army of them, and they are HUNGRY for human flesh. Yes, these giants like to eat people like they’re crawfish. I haven’t seen this many men get eaten since… I’m just going to kill that joke now because it’s way too easy.

Nicholas Hoult is uh-dorable as Jack. He’s so cute, but then you’ll remember him in “About a Boy” and feel guilty about your unclean thoughts. Ewan McGregor is crazy charming as a palace guard, but I was completely distracted by his fabulous HAIR! It’s so HIGH!

Despite its predictability and some truly uninspired dialogue, “Jack the Giant Slayer” is a heart-felt thrill ride so I’m giving it a B+. And YOU try to refrain from the “man-eater” jokes while watching it. It simply can’t be done!


pigs and a blanket pairs well

In the film, along with humans, the giants enjoy dining on pork. They crudely serve up the little porkers by wrapping them live in pasty dough and eating them whole.

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We thought we would refine the idea slightly by using chicken sausage and puff pastry. These are our fancy-ass pigs in a blanket. Although, technically, these are ‘chicks’ in a blanket, you get the idea and we clearly want very little to do with chicks in blankets…

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Quick tip: use a bread knife to carefully slice these into discs to serve as appetizers. 

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